OCTOBER MARKS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE MONTH

Love should never hurt.
And yet, relationship violence is a far too common dynamic for many women (and men) on today’s dating and mating scene. According to NBCNEWS.COM, “Nearly 3 U.S. women are killed every day by current or former romantic partners.”

WHAT EXACTLY IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

As per the Department of Justice: “We define domestic violence as a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner. Domestic violence can be physical, sexual, emotional, economic, or psychological actions or threats of actions that influence another person.”

WHO DOES DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IMPACT?

Domestic Violence affects women (and men) from all different walks of life; from different educational backgrounds, races, age groups, educational and economic leanings.
Domestic Violence does not discriminate.
Though its impact is far-reaching, reportedly, African-American women comprise about 50% of female homicide victims. Not only does Domestic Violence “hurt” its victims, it takes a collective and burdensome toll on friends, family members, employers, church communities, and society at large. It robs us of stolen potential and future contributions.
Because of the serious, horrific nature of this crime, Domestic Violence Awareness Month evolved from the "Day of Unity" held in October 1981 and was conceived by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.
The primary goals in the evolving years, has been to educate, empower and eventually eradicate this social ill.

 A LOOK AT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE THROUGH THE EYES OF A COP

Domestic Violence has so many “moving parts”.  From the victims, to the families, to the health care providers, to law enforcement officials. To provide a more comprehensive, well-rounded view of some of the situations and circumstances surrounding this issue, some time ago, we at IMGF interviewed a Chicago cop who has experience in professionally dealing with this area.
You can learn more about protective measures, warning signs, suggestions and other useful Domestic Violence information in her interview here:
http://inamaegreene.blogspot.com/2013/05/a-look-at-domestic-violence-through.html

IN CLOSING…

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES

If you or someone you love is caught in the grips of Domestic Violence, know that you are not alone. “Arm” yourself with accurate information, resources and available options, as they relate to your specific situation and location (or those that apply to your loved one).

Here are a few places and organizations (in addition to IMGF) that can help you with an array of needs, and provide guidance whatever your stage or transition.

NCADV.ORG
https://ncadv.org/learn-more/resources
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE RESOURCES BY CITY
http://www.dhs.state.il.us/page.aspx?item=31886
BETWEEN FRIENDS
http://betweenfriendschicago.org/gethelpnow_resources.html
Remember that: “A journey of a thousand miles begins with that first step.”
images  PIXABAY.COM

THIS SPRING-- “DECLUTTER” YOUR PERSONAL LIFE

Spring is on the horizon. And with it comes the usual cleaning, purging, dusting, and rearranging to improve our home’s interior and enhance our quality of life.

But, as we beautify our surroundings, it’s important to include our “personal dwelling” as well: our hearts, minds, body and spirit.  Because when we make our “temple” clean, lean and strong, we will experience a higher level of functioning and reach new heights on many other levels.

Allow me to elaborate here…

How many of us need to “toss” raggedy, toxic relationships?
To purge our hearts of bitterness and grudges?
To get our “financial house” in order?
To “dust off” outdated ways of thinking?
Hello?

In the words of Socrates: “ The unexamined life is not worth living.”

With this in mind, here are some areas to examine and address as you “declutter” your personal life this spring.

MIND

Do you lead a disciplined thought life? Are your thoughts positive or negative? The Bible tells us in Phillipians 4:8,” Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

Is your mind plagued by regrets from the past?  Remember…you can’t change the past, but you can learn the lesson and move forward with greater wisdom and grace.

HEART 

Do you have an extended stay at “the Heartbreak Hotel”? Are you repeating the same destructive habits and poor choices from years past?  Are you allowing yourself to be mentally or physically abused? Still? It’s not too late to break free to live the type of life you deserve and desire in 2017. There are many resources available to help. Check our website for details.
 http://www.inamaegreene.org/


BODY

Studies show that Blacks are affected by obesity disproportionately. Some contributing factors are lack of exercise, poor diets, and unhealthy lifestyles. Choose better. Make your health a priority. Don’t just strive to look pretty and fashionable. Dig deeper.

HERE ARE A FEW SUGGESTIONS:

Purchase a cookbook with healthy recipes and experiment with a new way of eating.
If you don’t like to exercise, consider other alternatives. Dancing, stepping, bowling, can all help to keep you active, boost your metabolism and burn extra calories. Do something…soon.
See your doctor regularly for routine screenings. It’s unwise to wait until you don’t feel well. Prevention is the key.

Are you on board to live better?

If you’d like to make 2017 a year of great progress, peace, and passion, remember that spring cleaning should include all aspects of your life for optimal results.
Now get moving. ☺

LOVE YOURSELF THIS VALENTINE’S DAY…

Many of us, as women, have been raised and socialized to look for our “knight in shining armor” to love us, rescue us, and lead us into “happily-ever-after”…

But, as we mature and grow in wisdom, we learn to separate fact from fiction. 

Or in some cases, fact from friction!

When we conduct a personal analysis of our lives and experiences with the opposite sex, we realize that relationships are far from perfect, and often lack that fairy tale ending we  hope for.

They can be complicated, confusing, combative.

And sometimes, may even be plagued with infidelity, abuse, anger, deception and irreconcilable differences.

All of which can cause us to lose sleep, rob us of our peace, doubt our worth.

Drama that can compromise our self-esteem and sense of safety.

But this Valentine’s Day, don’t lose heart. It’s not too late to learn to live differently, honor yourself, and create the type of future you desire and deserve.

And it begins with you, sweetheart.

If this Valentine’s Day finds you without a man or a plan, don’t despair.

As a popular song states: “I’ve got all my life to live, and I’ve got all my love to give. 

I will survive.”    

Don’t place your life on hold…you’re better than that. 

This Valentine’s Day, this year, you should:

 Pamper yourself.

 Buy your own roses.

 Eat from the good china.

 Go to a movie.

 Wear pretty lingerie, even if there’s no man to model it for.

 Get a massage.

 Start a journal to increase self-awareness, and make more informed decisions.

 Set boundaries. 

 Empower yourself. “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

 Live life on your own terms.

Because the best way to attract a great man who will love, respect, honor and cherish you

… is to lead by example.

Happy Valentine’s Day, beautiful!

HOW TO KEEP MORE RESOLUTIONS IN 2017!

Most folks start off on the right foot. To establish solid ground, and to improve upon the year before, they eagerly create New Year’s resolutions and promise to …

LOSE WEIGHT

SAVE MORE MONEY

WORK LESS

GOVERN STRESS

RELOCATE

WRITE A BOOK

CHANGE JOBS

TAKE BETER CARE OF THEIR HEALTH 

GO TO CHURCH

LEAVE A DYSFUNCTIONAL RELATIONSHIP

START ANEW…

Sound familiar?

But did you know that statistics show that only 8% of people actually keep their resolutions? Here are some more statistics you’ll also find interesting:
http://www.statisticbrain.com/new-years-resolution-statistics/

This can be a little discouraging.

But don’t give up hope here. You can achieve the things you desire and deserve.

However, in the words of Dr. Phil, “You can’t fix what you don’t acknowledge first.”

Accordingly, here’s why, despite your best intentions, you may “fall off” and become frustrated (and how to fix that).

1. YOUR GOALS ARE NOT WELL THOUGHT OUT
In other words, you need to have a game plan to accompany your goals for greater success. Hello? For example, it’s not enough to want to “lose weight,” how will you make it happen? Join Weight Watchers? Eat less? Go to the gym 3x a week? Give up pizza and pasta?
The more specific, strategic and realistic you are, the greater your odds for success.
2. YOU’RE “TALKING THE TALK, BUT NOT WALKING THE WALK”
Bust a move. Words without action to back it up are futile
3. YOU NEED HELP
And there’s no shame in it. The Bible states: “The wise seek counsel.”  Are you stuck in a rut? Require new skills to abandon an old job?  Seeking to leave an abusive relationship? Struggle with depression? There are an array of resources available to you, don’t suffer in silence or confusion.
You are not alone.
4. YOU’RE ALLOWING FEAR TO GOVERN YOUR ACTIONS
Everybody’s afraid. Of something…
But the key is to not let fears hold us hostage or keep us in destructive patterns. You can find a new love! A new life! Greater peace! More fulfillment! But to move forward, you must release old fears and doubt. Pray for guidance and needed direction.
5. YOU’RE NOT OBSERVING THE “S.M.A.R.T.” PRINCIPLE
In other words, for optimal success, your goals should be:

S   PECIFIC
M  EASURABLE
A  TTAINABLE
R   EALISTIC
T   IME-ORIENTED

In conclusion…

A better life and a better year are within your reach.
Follow these five timely tips as a road map for a smoother journey, as you navigate the path to success!

Happy New Year!